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While many marriages end amicably, there are some that end with bitter words and violence. In an alarming number of these cases, the abuse dates back to before the marriage's dissolution. Thankfully, victims of abuse can find at least some solace in the law; they are afforded many protections in the workplace, and they have the right to seek an order of protection to keep their abuser at bay. However, if there are children involved, their divorce case usually becomes far more complicated.
Parental rights are not intended for the parent; the courts afford them to parents to protect a child’s right to receive financial and emotional support from both of its biological parents. Because of this, victims of abuse may need to face some scary possibilities during their divorce:
Divorce mediation has quickly become a popular way for parties to divorce - and not just because it offers a more cost-effective way to dissolve a marriage. Mediation also encourages cooperation and compromise between the divorcing parties, which can help to improve the overall outcome for divorcing parents, older divorcing couples splitting a retirement, and couples with a high net worth marriage. Still, divorcing parties often feel more at ease when they know what to expect from the divorce mediation process. Learn more in the following sections, which address some of the most frequently asked questions about divorce mediation in Illinois.
Before mediation, divorcing parties were pitted against one another and placed on opposite sides in court litigation. Sadly, this led to many poor outcomes, especially for children. Mediation works differently. It encourages the parties to compromise and come to an agreement that works for all involved parties (parents, children, and even pets). Parties who successfully reach an agreement can avoid court proceedings altogether, but if an agreement cannot be made, the parties may still address their issues in court and allow a judge to decide on the matters that are pertinent or problematic in their divorce.
Holidays can be a stressful time for anyone, but for blended families, the season can be especially trying. There are additional challenges that come with an increasing and revolving number of faces, such as multiple or various family schedules and changing or canceled plans. Thankfully, there are some strategies that blended families can use to minimize stress and encourage bonding and a happier holiday season.
Even though holiday plans can (and often do) change, it is important for your family to start with a framework. It can give you guidance and allow you to block out time more efficiently. When events conflict, work hard to come up with a compromise.
Realize that, above all else, what everyone truly wants is for the children to enjoy the holiday season as much as possible. Family times, such as when grandparents are in town, are good to prioritize, as are any holiday traditions that can still be carried out, even after the massive changes of divorce (i.e. purchasing a living tree and then planting it at the end of the season).
Parents and guardians who experience an investigation from the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services (DCFS) are often caught in a whirlwind of emotion. Worry, fear, and anxiety may plague them both night and day. Little can be done to truly ease these worries, but with proper legal representation and an in-depth understanding of your rights, it is possible to increase your family’s chances of a favorable outcome during a DCFS investigation.
DCFS investigations can occur for a number of reasons, but they tend to fall into one of three categories: abuse, neglect, or dependency. These are defined as follows:
Abuse and neglect cases: Can be filed, even if only one parent is thought to be abusive or neglectful to the child. Cases may also be filed based on what is known as “anticipatory neglect,” in which children are considered to be at significant risk of abuse; and
While many studies have indicated that children can recover from the emotional turmoil of a divorce (and may, in some situations, fare better in divorce than if their parents stayed together), they are still vulnerable and innocent parties who can be significantly and negatively impacted by the process. As such, parents are encouraged to make every reasonable effort to mitigate the risk of divorce-related maladjustment in their child. One of the more effective ways to do this is through communication - and not just about the divorce itself, but also the feelings that children are likely to experience as they adjust to the changes of their new life.
Divorcing parents were once led to believe that children were “resilient” enough to withstand the emotional turmoil of divorce without any long-term, negative effects, but more recent data disproves this outdated theory. Children can experience maladjustment issues from a divorce, even if they do not display any immediate signs or symptoms. That is because, like adults, children can experience the complexity of grief, loss, pain, stress, and even self-blame during the divorce process. If not addressed appropriately, those feelings can simmer below the surface, only to emerge at a later date - and often at a time when the parent least expects it.
Most divorcing couples realize that compromise is the least difficult path in a divorce. Sadly, there are those who will stop at nothing to “get even” or get what they want. Take a divorcing Oklahoma woman’s situation for example.
During a meeting with her husband to sign paperwork for their divorce, he allegedly handed her a drugged cup of coffee. While it took her a while to realize that something was “off,” she ultimately discovered that she had been drugged after taking an over-the-counter drug test.
At that time, she also realized that their 3-month-old baby had been breastfed three times since consuming the coffee. She voluntarily took the baby to the hospital to ensure its safety, and she reported the incident to the police. The woman then pressed criminal charges and sought a restraining order against her husband to ensure the future safety or herself and her child.
Today, the word “coach” extends far beyond the world of sports. In fact, you can find a coach for almost anything these days - life coaches, weight loss coaches, and even divorce coaches. What is a divorce coach, and do you really need one during your Illinois divorce. Moreover, how might these professionals fit into your divorce team and overall strategy? The following information can help you learn more.
As the name implies, divorce coaches assist parties as they navigate through the complexities of their separation. The application of these services can be logistical, emotional or even just supportive. For example, your divorce coach might assist you with tasks like gathering paperwork or creating and maintaining a budget, or their work may entail connecting you with a support group or therapist while you work through the grieving process. Just remember that a divorce coach should never be thought of as a replacement for a seasoned divorce lawyer. Divorce coaches cannot provide you with detailed legal advice, nor can they handle the complex legal paperwork and process of a divorce. For this type of assistance, you still need an attorney.
Divorce can be expensive in any state or situation, but the complexity, exact circumstances, and exact location of a divorce are all significant factors in determining the final price. In respect to location, one study recently determined which 10 states were the most expensive when it came to divorce costs.
Illinois, though not found on that list, has seen some high-profile divorce cases over the years. It also regularly processes simple divorce cases, where there are few assets and no children. How might these additional factors impact the cost of your Illinois divorce, and how can you avoid excessive fees and expenses during your case? The following explains.
Location can be important in determining the overall cost of a divorce, but a better price indicator is the complexity of the case. Still, it is important to remember that even complex issues can be mitigated against. For example, high net worth divorces can be extremely costly, but parties can often save a significant amount of money if they divorce amicably and settle quickly. Cases involving children can become extremely complex, resulting in costly legal fees, or they can be peacefully negotiated. Interestingly enough, such methods are often child-focused, which can help to ensure the child’s best interest and bond with each parent are preserved.
Divorce is not a decision that comes easily. In fact, most people spend months, sometimes even years contemplating whether divorce is the next best step in their life. Regardless of where they are in the decision-making process, it is important that parties take immediate steps to protect their wealth and future well-being. At worst, the divorce never happens and they gain a better understanding of their finances and emotional health. At best, they are prepared and well-situated for the road ahead, which can increase the chances of a favorable outcome in their Illinois divorce.
Although many couples share a bank account, credit card, and other debts, not everyone is aware of their family’s finances. For example, you may know about how much you and your spouse earn each month, but are you up-to-date on the amount in your spouse’s retirement account? Are there any undisclosed debts that your spouse may not have discussed with you? Do you know what monthly bills are associated with the home, and which are personal expenditures? What is the worth of any businesses, stocks, bonds, or real estate held in either your name or your spouse’s?
When the clear and inevitable path for a marriage becomes a divorce, the parties are encouraged to carefully contemplate their next steps, as many of the impending decision impact the direction, dynamics, and outcome of the case. As an example, one might consider both the positive and negative consequences of being the first one to file for divorce. By doing this, parties can decide whether they should take swift action and file right away, or if they should or can wait to file (knowing that their spouse may file first) because it is a better strategy for their unique situation.
Filing first for a divorce can lead to both positive and negative consequences for the deciding party. By weighing them out, cognitively, and not allowing yourself to be emotionally-driving in your decisions, you can take a major step toward improving the outcome of your case.
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